art credit: Moonlight Fantasy by Mary Espen
why do I dwell here
in such darkness
so removed from the light?
surely my soul would thrive
if sunshine filled me —
but isn’t there muted light
from the moon as well?
And I need the dark to see it–
this duality confuses me
I question my very existence–
Is it time to let go
of the questions
and merely do the work?
Geez, Lori… You just told my life story…
That’s scary, Calen… no one should live that story
You’re right, but it was all kept hidden safely in my head.I never let anyone see anything.
I tend to do that as well.. I think we just need to let it all out, regardless of the consequences sometimes.
You know, I remember when Bran was four and I was just spaced out on the bed, so weary and lethargic. He crawled up beside me and asked me if I was going to die. That’s what snapped me out of it…
Oh wow… what a powerful life-changing moment! Have you written about this? If not, you should!
No, I haven’t written about it except maybe in my journal. My sister knows. I always kept my assortment of masks in a jar beside the door (as the Beatles would say). You know, when you come across as so self-sufficient no one ever asks how you are. I learned that a long time ago. My counselor told me to stop being a “pull yourself up by your own bootstraps” person and I don’t know how to do that. 😦
I can so relate to this, Calen… I’ve had to learn to be vulnerable, something so foreign to me since I’ve been guarded since childhood. I think you need to write about this and explore it more. It may open up avenues you’ve never dreamed possible and help someone else in the process.
If the right time ever presets itself I will. Who knows. Maybe one of these prompts will be that time. 🙂
Yes, when the moment presents itself 🙂